Wow, Sarah, Missy, Amy & Ginger!

I made a thankful list (see previous blog) and I am thankful for all those things that I wrote but there was a story for each one and I held myself back because I thought that it might be a bit too much. But I'm in a melancholy mood so I'm laying it out there. Comment if you like. *grin!*

You know what I mean, jelly bean! You're thankful for tons but then it crawls up your leg of your life's uneasiness. So here it is...

I'm thankful

for a job even if it is part time.

Crud...actually, I first wrote FUCK...just like that, loud and all hanging out there but then I deleted each letter slowly thinking, "don't want to offend anybody!"

FUCK/Crud on the part time. I can't pay my phone bill, my car insurance (again!), my internet (I won't be able to read my blogs!) and all the other bills. This month I am scraping to pay my rent. Laughing butttt...I bought my food. No food left behind. That should be the name of my memoir! "A hot and steamy day a chicken leg walked into my life, no other chicken leg had done that to me..."

that I'm in Real Estate school.

I am beyond thankful to be in Real Estate school! It means a means to the end, a light at the end of the tunnel...a possibility of how my life should be,... will be. The ama-ZING thing is one of the owners of the job where I am a receptionist at PAID for my 5 classes. She knew that I was better than the receptionist job and needed to go...hmmmm...okay, start singing You Are The Wind Beneath My Wings...because she is. The last 8 months I've been trying to afford to get my Real Estate License but I couldn't reach it.

-tried saving but when I'm eating from the food bank not many quarters were dropping in that bucket.
-Valentine's Day-I made 1,000 heart valentines to sell on the street which my placard said, 'Be My Valentine, Send this girl back to school'. I made 45 cents.
-I finally was able to get a second job. I worked for the census. I put one week's paycheck toward a Real Estate correspondence course. I realized very quickly that I am not a correspondence kinda learner. So I sent it back. The post office decided to push my box of new books into traffic and what was received was every book was ripped with tar gooey-ed onto them. HUH? They only gave me a partial refund.
-With that partial refund, a tooth infection dentist bill and TX car registration became of it.

"oh my goodness! Oh my goodness!", whined the little girl in Annie.

So I went to one of my boss' and said, "you have a new house that you're trying to fix up, can I work to raise my school money?" So I started and pulled down wallpaper for 8 hours (ow!) and she came up and said, "okay, you can work it off but you're starting school on Monday" and nothing I could say to tell her I wanted to work it off before would do any good. So I started school, passed the first class and started my second class today! So I am totally and forever grateful because she was able to pay it forward and I JUST know this will change my life because I will be able to finally get a full time job that will not only pay my bills but allow me to save. Pinch me for this cannot be real because I am sooo excited!

that I have my own apartment that I really, really like.

I am so blessed to live by myself. My place is clean and I don't have to worry about roommates! :) Yippeee!


that I could afford groceries and it's food I enjoy.

well, this month...but I still look in my fridge and pantry and smile that there is food in them.

that I am a hard worker and that I am responsible with a kind heart.

I am.

for my car, Kevin.

even though I need two new tires he still is an awesome Sport SUV that I am proud to own and it is soooo close to being paid OFF!


that I have an overhead fan in my bedroom.

it gets warm here in Austin even with the A/C! You try it!

for my sister B who leaves me funny voicemails.

I love my family even when I don't! :)

that I live in a neat city even if it's muggy.

I went to Barton Springs last Friday and swam in 68 degree water when it was hot and muggy outside. It was a great afternoon.

that my dad is doing good.

oh my, I was nervous for my dad! Now I'm thinking how can I sign up!! Laughing!!

I'm thankful

that I have a cool blog.

It took me awhile to come up with the name Pencil Skirt Bound so I think I have a cool blog. I had to get down to the bones of the matter (hold the fat) and imagine what I want to look like and that lovey-dovey pencil skirt kept rising to the top. AND I have cool people that comment. Thank you to Sarah, Missy, Amy and Ginger.

when people comment. (I get excited!)

"comment, comment, comment." It still cracks me up!

when people follow my blog. (I get really excited!)

Not many people want to follow me but I get it. I'm more of a lackadaisical weight loser (not looser!!!) so you'll have to follow me till I'm 60 years old to see the shocking weight loss and I get that is too much of an investment for some. Eh, your loss!

Life Is Good.

I'm thankful

for a job even if it is part time.
that I'm in Real Estate school.
that I have my own apartment that I really, really like.
that I could afford groceries and it's food I enjoy.
that I am a hard worker and that I am responsible with a kind heart.
for my car, Kevin.
that I have an overhead fan in my bedroom.
for my sister B who leaves me funny voicemails.
that I live in a neat city even if it's muggy.
that my dad is doing good.

I'm thankful

that I have a cool blog.
when people comment. (I get excited!)
when people follow my blog. (I get really excited!)

One Down, Four To Go!

I've been AWOL because I....dun dun dunNNNNN....started Real Estate school this week to get my real estate license! I am so stoked that I'm a big ball of HAPPINESS! And I passed my first class of Law of Contracts today!! It was a tough week of going to school all day Monday-Thursday but I did it. 3 more weeks!

AND-
I brought my meal to eat throughout the day, my vitamins (which I only took twice) and my water jug (which fits 10 C of water) and I drank all of it everyday!! I'm down on my weight but I wanted to wait since I felt my scale was lame (it wasn't digital) since if I moved my body at all on it, my weight would increase or decrease and I didn't feel that was good mentally for me since I was so frustrated. However, my friend gave me her scale so I'm hoping next week I can begin logging my weight again to keep accountability rockin'.

Today I ate so you can get a clue on what I'm doing on Atkins~

Breakfast-
iced green tea
2 eggs, leftover porkchop and steak (small amt) and avocado mixed all up.
Snack-
4oz cheese
Lunch-
coleslaw and grilled chicken w/ lil bbq sauce
iced regular tea
snack-
pork rinds (please withhold your comments :) )
Snack that I'm drinking right now-
glass of white wine
Supper-
probably shrimp and sauteed zuccini

I Would Like To Thank...

I received my very first award from Annie @ Annie Weighs!

Here are the rules:
1. Thank the person who gave you the award.
2. Share seven things about yourself.
3. Nominate seven newly discovered blogs.
4. Let your nominees know about the award

Things about Me!
1. My Explorer is named Kevin.
2. I love swimming. I think it makes life better to be able to pretend I'm a mermaid for a little while.
3. I'm really struggling thinking of 7 things to share which is nutso since I can talk anyone's ear off.
4. I love having my own apartment. It's clean and I don't have to clean after anyone else which I really am grateful for.
5. I am often told that I look like Kirstie Alley.
6. My favorite holidays are Thanksgiving and Independence Day because of the same reasons. I get to just hang with my family, have good food and play games.
7. I'm often sung to when I meet older people because they remember the song Carrie Ann by The Hollies. "Hey Carrie Ann, what's your game now can anybody play?"

My Nominees!

1. Ginger @ http://365daysofwhat.blogspot.com/ 365 Days of What?

~Ginger is a terrific commenter which makes me smile every time I see her kissy face picture!~

2. Sarah @ http://foodandtherapy.blogspot.com/ (Food Will Not Define Me Forever)

~Sarah is a lovey-dovey! There have been moments when I've been down and knowing that we have gone through some of the same things has made my day a little more bearable.~

3. Lafngrl @ http://35yearoldface.blogspot.com/ (Virtual Biggest Loser, Summer of 2010)

~I like her attitude in her goals!~

4. Missy @ http://misspuddingfood.wordpress.com/ (Fatology)

~I so appreciate her candor in her feelings and her words. I love that she can toss around the word 'fuck' but there is purpose behind it and you can feel it through her writing. But I hate it because I cannot figure out how to follow those wordpress bloggers.~

5. Kirsten @ http://results-not-typical-girl.com/wordpress/ (Results Not Typical Girl)

~Kirsten's writing is funny...like real funny. Where I am more reflective in my writing I so appreciate her openness for just what is in front of her. It's refreshing!

6. Amanda @ http://assinseat.blogspot.com/ (Ass in Seat)

~I love the name of Amanda's blog! When I went to San Diego recently during the flight I thought about her due to my big behind was in an airplane seat. :)~

7. Miss Haneefa @ http://blackgirlgetsfit.blogspot.com/ (Black Girl Gets Fit)

~Miss Haneefa has a terrific blog. It's uplifting and she keeps with her goals. She writes them out clearly and reviews them which always helps me to review mine.~

Update From My Dad-

Recap-my dad had gastric bypass surgery about a month ago. He was 'only' 80 lbs overweight but he had serious medical issues that they thought the surgery would help.

July 13, 2010
"The big difference is in the weight, a little over 35 lbs loss and a loss of 21 inches.

I see the surgeon tomorrow for my first month checkup. Except for my lower back, which still is extremely sore, and trying to figure out what I can eat and how much is still a big learning curve for me, I'm doing okay. It will get better I hope as I'm suppose to slowly start to eat regular food. Right now if I eat too fast - pain, if I eat too much (trying to figure how much is too much is still a big question) - pain, and that goes the same for drinking liquids, as well as how often to eat. Right now I'm eating/drinking about 4 to 5 times a day.

I bought a year's pass to the pool and have been doing aqua-jogging laps for more exercise. I definitely get a workout with jogging with the aqua-jogger vest. That and our stroll (0.6 mile) that Murphy (their dog) and I do every other day is slowly starting to get me back in a little better shape. I meant to get over to physical therapy and ask them for some exercises that I should be doing but I keep getting sidetracked. Maybe later this week."

July 14, 2010

"Saw the doctor today and he was pleased with my weight loss, lower blood pressure and blood sugar. As to my back pain he said it was no longer the surgery. Most likely caused by my body changes and therefore my back is trying to adjust to my new body. Spent some time then talking with their nutritionist about food and sort of how to go about changing over to harder more substantial food. She told me to try fish which I did when I got home. I had some salmon and baked a piece with a small amount of olive oil, just like she said. I had a small piece, about 2 x 3 x 1" and took my time eating it. Tasted great, but 10 min later it felt like I swallowed a beach ball and someone was filling it with air. Laid down for a little bit and that didn't help. Finally about an hour later the pressure is going down. Not completely yet but so much better. I guess I'm going to have to start with maybe a third of that. I have some more that I cooked up but didn't eat. I may try a much smaller sample tomorrow."


Thanks for the prayers and thoughts! Keep 'em coming!

Don't Throw Bread At Me!

All right so moving along in my journey....

I have started Atkins. Not the Atkins were all I'm eating is animal protein but veggies as part of the fiber content. I thought of chickening out and not write the truth that I decided to move away from Weight Watchers and try Atkins. I felt as if I was getting fatter so I thought this might be a good start for me. I've also been looking for a treadmill that someone might not want anymore.

I'll check back in soon but I wanted to start off truthfully!

One Lesson

Why is it that I am willing to stop living my life because of fat? Thinking logically about it in that terms makes me feel so silly, so ridiculous...yet it's there and it sure isn't going anywhere no matter how many times I try to Kumbaya it away.




I had a terrific time going home. I mean TERRIFIC!! I was able to soak in my family and friends and my cat in. I loved being able to drive around and know exactly how to get where I was going and knew all the streets between me and there. No guessing, no worrying! It felt so stress-FREE! (You know what I mean when you move to a new place and even if you've been there a year you still wonder, "where does that street lead to?") And to bring myself back to my ridiculous self of not living due to being fat...it felt so nice to visit with my family and friends. Was I probably judged about my weight? Yes but I didn't notice it! I hadn't been home in a year and the last 6 months I really didn't want to go home because I felt even fatter than when I left. I was feeling who wants to have fun while carrying a 6th grader on my back. But even with that middle schooler on my back, I am so thankful I went home. I felt like I was given new eyes to my life. I felt refreshed and ready to go live my stressful, crazy life.

Celebrate Your Independence!

I came home for a long weekend. I am so excited! I haven't been home in a year and I've missed my family AND the weather. There has been a high learning curve to living in Austin and living with high humidity! This post is a BRAVO because I haven't been wanting to come home because I'm embarrassed that I'm still overweight but last week I thought, "enough is enough, go HOME!" And I did and it's been terrific! I've been hanging outside every moment I can get trying to soak in the weather and how lovely it is here. I've also been getting as many hugs as I can from my family! So even though I'm still fat I'm working on not letting me stop living my life! This trip was a huge part of that....because imagine sitting on the plane in the cattle car section, not having the cutest clothes and tugging and pulling at them all the time, seeing my family and friends AND doing all this while hating that I'm still fat.

But I came anyway! So in a way I'm celebrating my independence (even if it is from myself!)

Happy 4th of July everyone!

"Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it." ~Mark Twain